Having a doula on your team is totally your call for what kind of birth you want. First of all, your partner is not your doula and just can’t be. Just like your doula can’t be your partner. (unless there is a story here not told.)
Your partner has intimate knowledge about you. S/he has always been there for you through different things that your doula has not been. Your doula has intimate knowledge about birth. She has seen placentas. She has seen many women breastfeed, she has experienced birth and everything that comes with it.
So, since we are two different people, we can support partner just as much as momma giving birth. So how can your doula help your partner?
We don’t help in birth alone. Do you know how much a doula does to support families? We help with other things as well, fertility, birth, and postpartum, some have sleep consultant training and so much more that is available. Most doulas offer a sliding scale to work with your financial needs to support you and your family.
Doula’s bring plans & agendas. A doula’s main focus is the momma and her wants and needs but becoming a good team can bring happiness to the entire family. To work as a team with the partner you need to fully understand the partner, his needs and worries. So, in the long run, we come to help everyone and let fear not be a part anymore.
Partners need to break as well. Labour and Birth can be long… they can make you wish that you could sleep for days. Sometimes you want to eat or rest. But you don’t want to leave while she might need you the most. Having a doula can allow you to take a rest and let the doula stay with momma.
Give Partners ideas on how to help. Sometimes and most times partners don’t know much about birth. (Doula’s have trained and know a lot about birth) Sometimes a partner dreams about being very involved but sometimes things don’t go as imagined. Doulas provide opportunity and the knowledge to understand how to do it.
Translation to English, please. Have you ever heard the doctor tell you something and not know what they were talking about? Did you wish someone was there to explain? Or you wanted to shout out that the doc needs to say it in English? Doulas can help be your translator. Most times they will have the information you need on hand and let you know what the doctor means.
Doula’s are a helpful resource. We are not there to replace anyone on your birth team but add to the team. If your partner is on the fence about hiring a doula try to get a meeting and let the doula explain in person how they can help you AND your partner
